i told you how i felt.
i told you i havent stopped falling in love with you.
you said you couldnt tell me something you werent sure of.
i think it hurt less when my ex boyfriend of a year cheated on me and started dating some girl right after breaking up with me.
i think it would hurt less to get hit by a car.
i want to throw up.
i never want to eat again.
i want to cut the shit out of my arms, and i dont even do that.
i dont want to be here.
 

im disgusting and fat.no wonder you probably dont love me.
diet and workout starts tomorrow. 

you read my other blog but you should know im in love with you.
ive been in love with you since january.we were on the couch and you were doing something silly with your face and making some funny sound,and i almost blurted it out.that was the first time i wanted to say it.
it is killing me that i have to keep it in.
i am in love with you.not puppy love.not the kind of love that goes away when i am mad at you.not the kind of love that will go away if you leave me.
this is the kind of love that im going to think about five,ten,and fifty years from now, whether youre still with me or not.
i am in love with you.love,love,love.
this is nothing i have never felt before.
i love you. 

please love me back.

started feb3.
been doing very good so far.refused brownies and extra food.
i have been eating enough calories but not too much.
making healthy choice (:
exercising more.

i have until march 3.
i want to lose a significant amount of weight,and i know i can.